Falling in love for a creature like me happens all too easily.

In a glance I can see into the soul and in a 5 minute conversation I’ve been known to see enough to fall deeply in love. It took years of hard work to train myself not to fall so quickly.

That training was pain filled with a sorrow so sweet that I wasn’t trying all that hard for the first few decades.

The pain of losing love is a sorrow of sweetness only known by those who love with all they have or not at all.

Without the spirals of joy the sorrow would not be so sweetly bitter.

Like any junkie that is crashing off addiction and getting clean, it sucks donkey dick with a load that will shoot you across the room.

I may not want to use that in the book. Even I’m reading it and think it’s a bit much, however for my personal journal no one will read, it really does sum it up quite well. 

Any recovering addict can attest to the disgusting creature one feels like when going through withdrawal. When that addiction is to falling in love, well withdrawal can look like the angriest prick you never want to meet.

It’s not that I ever felt unwhole and was seeking to complete me, it was the rush and the drug it became.

I remember the first time I fell in love. I was 6 and she lived across street. Pretty blue eyes and white blond hair. It was her soul I fell in love with and the eyes were just the window that reflected the beauty within.

It is true what they say about the eyes being the window to the soul for those who know how to see that soul and into it. It’s why my favorite part of a woman’s body is her eyes.

It’s the flesh that gets in the way of true soul connection and love. What we see wrapped around the soul often keeps us from seeing the soul within.

The desires of the flesh often leave us ignorant of the soul. Many destroy their souls through sex, not because of any immorality, it’s simply how the soul works.

I can pick your soul apart like most people breathe, and as I’m picking, I’m picking the parts I would like to devour.

I’ve taken a lot of time in life to study my food and make sure I have a healthy meal to eat.

Those who give it away, I rarely bother with, as most of what is left isn’t worth even sniffing at. I like food that is picky about what it does with its body, and who it does it with. Yes, at times I refer to the human in front of me as an it, nothing more than my food.

How do they do it with cows and pigs and chickens and fish and what not?

Thinking of your food as an it removes all the guilt from devouring it.

For all those self righteous vegans out there, plants have souls too. I often spend time in commune with trees and grass and all manner of plant life. Those vegan twats are as murdering as any other.

I’m not sure this book is the best idea. I can already hear vegans complaining about being called twats. Maybe I’ll leave that part out, maybe not. I’ll find out when I get around to writing the actual book. 

Still I think the best idea might be to introduce myself through the romances of my life. Give them a big reveal at the end about being a soul sucking vampire.

Of course this means I’m gong to have to talk about sex. For that topic I will want to start with the woman who took my virginity. One of the few moments of my life I don’t mind remembering. I truly was in love, as was she.

I think I will pick that up in the next entry and for tonight I shall let the thought of that sweet love lull me to sleep one more time.