Thank you Van Hagar.

I don’t get some women. Sweetheart has not shown for work in the last couple days. I found her on Facebook and asked how her mother was doing. Then I said I wanted to be friends. If you don’t reply I’ll never bother you again.

My medicine by the pretty reckless is playing and I get it.

I’m a hardcore romantic. I buy flowers just because. I write poetry. I cook, I clean, I give full body massages. I’m a tantra master.

And I’ve been celibate for over 10 years now.

4 wives.

That has looking for the one. The one that gets me.

There have been several, several, several women that have applied to my mine.

Here’s the thing about valentine’s day, if you need one day a year to show someone how much you love them, what in the blue holy fuck are you doing with anyone?

My wives, and girlfriends can tell you that I never missed a birthday, anniversary, anything that was important to her.

I didn’t care, but she cared and that was enough for me.

I get I’m a rare commodity. I’m a gentleman who is intelligent. A gentleman who knows how to treat a lady, and will only accept a lady.

A lady needs no make up.

I loved my wives for what they looked like without makeup more than with.

Foolin’ by Def Leppard is playing.

My playlist has it in for me.

I should stop now before…

Today I went out to smoke and the power went out.

However I did get a nasty piece of plastic out of my finger finally.

Now the power is on.

What you give by Tesla came on.

You do get what you give.

I look at my coworkers and I see a bit of of me in them.

I see the dude who couldn’t be any duder if wasn’t such a great dude at 25.

Then there’s the smart ass I was, you think he gets away with a damn thing with me?

He made me laugh once, but he didn’t know.

Then there’s the madame. She’s living her dream.

Then there’s the guy that I once was. Several of the guys I once was.

I got better.

Then there’s the two that i get it, but I wish I didn’t.

I love my life.

I love that my boss is left handed like me.

I get the dude who offered me ride and he is a dude for sure.

And I caught a couple dudes that reminded me I’m not the only one.

Working at Walmart has been fun. It’s beat the shit out of me. However, it’s a job I enjoy.

Always the masochist, just beat me, whip me call me Susan.

Actually on second thought, no.

That used to me.

I’m not sure what wally world has for me next, but it will fun.

No matter what you do, no matter where you go, have fun, if it’s not fun, make it fun. Because no one likes to work.

I’ve been saying this for more than 35 years.

I figured it would catch at some point.

Actually no I didn’t and I’m glad it never did. Then I would have to find a new way to say it.

I do this. When something I say gets around to the point where others are saying it, a friend once told me her daughters called it Jimisms. That’s when I knew I had get some original material.

I’m always on. Even when I’m not, I am.

The shows I’ve put on, the shows I will put on as a performance artist.

Everything is art.

Everything.

And I’m doing just fine.

I love The Killers and that’s one band I’d love to see. Mr. Brightside was playing when I came in.

Coming out of my cage, this really hits home with me. I feel as if I’ve been caged for five years. Since my stroke.

Now I have two projects for the weekends that are going to take a lot.

Let me explain.

I understand at this level and it’s a high as fuck level.

I need to get, for lack of a better word, stupid. I have an IQ of 215.

For me conversation that isn’t about something scientific, spiritual, or from one my favorite TV Shows or movies or music.

If you can introduce me to new music, I’ll be your friend.

My favorite shows are the Star Treks, Andromeda, Farscape, Stargate SG-1.

At one point I had down loaded all ten seasons of SG-1. I have seen the entire series several times.

One of my favorites is when the have a show about the Stargate, called Wormhole Extreme. Carter, says it would be a great front for the program. If any gets wise they can blame the show.

I think about putting myself in front of people to hide. I’ve done it before.

Like, I really think there is a program, whether or not it’s Stargate, or something else. Now I can’t confirm it, it’s an idea the show have me with that episode.

What if?

The Who with Baba O’Riley.

I’ve done a ton of arguing over the course of my life. I’ve won more than I lost. I learn when I lose.

I need someone to beat me in an argument.

I want to learn.

Sweetheart showed up for work tonight and gave me Chinese food, my favorite.

I don’t know why she is just amazing.

That’s how I know I’m in love.

Like a teenage wasteland.

The fucked up thing her name is the same as one of my wives, the one I liked the most.

So I’m looking at how I’m going give instruction for The Book of Khaos Majick. I think I will take a page from me, and I’ll do it here.

I’ll be doing this once a week. On Saturday.

You feel I don’t want to do it, but I’m going to because there are those that will be able to understand with a little instruction.

The same thing goes with Abnormal Psychology of a Conduit. Saturday. This i actually look forward to. I figure I’ll learn by teaching.

With my life, it’s typically what I do. Learn by teaching.

The teaching is done by what I channel using my mouth.

Man in the mirror has been playing whole I’ve been writing this.

So will sweetheart invite me out as friends?

I really hope so.

Have a blessed one and be excellent on purpose.

I take spirituality seriously.

I’m not a serious person, but I can be.

Everything is situational.

I look at giving instruction on spirituality and I don’t want to do it. If I fuck up, I fuck their lives up. I don’t want that responsibility, but I’ll take it.

Responsible.

I’m responsible.

The understandings that come through as I write about this tells me I’m doing the right thing. It’s my decision and I’ve made it.

Fuck it, I’m doing it anyway even though it scares the shit out of me.

Fuck fear.

What’s next?

I was talking to myself. This is what I was saying.

“I’m smoking God, God lit my cigarette, God is in everything.”

I needed to remind myself of that.

Does this mean I’m God?

Yes, but that dog, that dog is God as well. That shit that you don’t want deal with, that’s God that you don’t want to deal with.

I was reading the blog/book I wrote, The Book of Khaos Majick.

It’s a spiritual guide for spirituality. If you understand what it says you don’t need me.

This is the shit I don’t want to deal with, those who need me to instruct them.

That’s Gods and Gods that need me to give instruction.

That’s exactly what I fear most.

I haven’t said fuck it, and I’m thinking about it. I know me, if I’m writing about it, fuck it, I’ll do it.

I have been setting myself for this and it was a sweet set up and I’m grateful for the set up.

So God is in everything and what we as individuals manifest through our words and actions is shared among the shared reality shared by all.

Get your head around that, all.

Every living, non living thing in the entire universe shares this reality.

Who am I to say a thing about a thing?

If you’ve read me, you know. If not, find someone who has.

Have a blessed one and be excellent on purpose.

This is The Book of Khaos Majick. Scroll all the way down the start.

https://thebookofkhaos.wordpress.com/

As much as this title is weird as fuck, it describes my life and thank you Sturgill Simpson for this one.

The next song Peace Easy Feeling by the Eagles.

I started writing a text book, and I like to write blog, so I’m writing on this blog.

The Abnormal Psychology of a Conduit.

I had an issue with abnormal, but I figure I’m not normal so abnormal it is.

This is scary shit.

Fuck it, I’m doing anyway.

This is how I got to be me. A series of scary shit and I said fuck it, I’m doing it anyway.

Why let fear paralyze me?

It makes no sense. I push through it knowing I got to do it. I can let the fear make it a miserable experience or I can push though the fear by saying fuck it.

In that moment I take the power back. I know I will survive whatever, so now it’s time to do it.

That takes less than a fraction of a second for my mind to set it’s course. Once my mind is made up, there is no changing it unless one can show a more efficient way.

Fear is not efficient. However fear can cause one to find efficiency. It can motivate one to know the most efficient way to do something.

I fear writing an actual text book, all the reviews and peer reviews and shit like that. Fear has given me the efficient way to write it, on my blog.

I figure if anyone can understand what I write, why should I charge anyone for anything I write?

I can come up with justifications left and write. I’ve already done that.

This is it.

This is why I don’t make money for being a Táltos. In ancient times a shaman would have another job because what he did for people he wouldn’t  charge them.

Those who need, need.

It is a mockery of shamanism that any one shaman makes a living as a Shaman.

Have a blessed one and be excellent on purpose.

Thank you Mr. Steve Winwood for this adventure into my mind that has been strategically twisted.

I’m on one tonight.

Evolved.

Would you consider an evolved being to be inferior, superior, or the same as any other being?

Let’s dive in.

How does one quantify inferior and superior?

Telepathic communication.

Communicating with images in the mind with emotional concepts. No language.

If one can’t do this, is one inferior to one that can?

For me, I used to think I wasn’t a telepath. At one point in life I would have felt inferior to another that was a telepath.

Understanding that one can communicate without words across the universe, that would make that one superior.

Why?

Communication is how we evolve.

How we communicate says everything about us.

As humans we like to feel superior to everything.

The idea that we’re inferior never crosses our minds.

Look at Dr. Steven Greer and his documentaries.

If that doesn’t tell you how inferior we are, nothing will until they show up.

For me, I’m waiting patiently for them to show the fuck up already.

White room by Cream has me thinking no stings can secure you.

What strings are people looking for?

The strings that hold them back from getting the full experience.

What is the full experience?

Of what?

Life.

Well, what strings come with life?

You have to pay to live. That’s the first one that comes up.

We are the only species, creatures, animals that pay to live.

Other species live in the on the same planet we do, why don’t they have to pay to live?

Why is it we can’t live within our ecosystem without trashing it?

I get why I am at zero zone anger.

I’ve been in a conversation with a guy who thinks his name means something because his money his tied to his name.

He thinks he’s evolved because he learned the same shit everybody has learned and doesn’t think that we exist to share life.

He thinks we exist to create a name for ourselves.

I used to think that, but I evolved.

We exist to share life with others. That simple. What we do with our lives is our choice.

Every last one of us has the choice to make.

We can screw others and call it gamesmanship.

We can screw the planet and call it doing it our way and no one can stop us.

We can call it narcissism and we can tell the narcissists to shut the fuck up as we need to share life so that all can live.

The zero point energy needs to be released.

Why do we still build cars using gas?

Why haven’t the pipelines been closed off?

Why aren’t we using hemp and stop cutting down trees that can fix the atmosphere?

Greed is the only answer.

Think about it, Saudi Arabia would fold.

The Arabs would be happy to see the Saudi family fail and fail huge.

Loggers would fail and fail huge.

These two groups of people need to fail and fail huge.

Thank you Katy Perry.

It’s a reminder I needed.

I don’t know if anyone can understand what I’m going to try to explain.

Some of it has no words only understanding.

Think about let your good deeds go unnoticed.

I shine like a motherfucker.

At work tonight this song played and it made  me want to cry. The words hitting home. Few song make me want to cry.

This one was the first time it made me want to cry.

Why is it that I wanted to cry?

As the chorus hit I could feel my eyes well up and I held it. Each time the chorus hit me eyes welled, and each time I held it.

It was an understanding of my life, where it is, where it was, where it’s going. I don’t know where it’s going but I have an idea.

Sound of madness by Shinedown is playing. Oh how I know the sound of madness. I wouldn’t say I wrote the book on pain, but my life has dealt with pain upon pain upon pain.

When am I going to wake up and fight for myself?

What’s the point of fighting?

I find that using peaceful, yet teachable lessons are something that can happen.

One does not need to fight.

One can negotiate and stuff.

Don Henley gets the credit for this one.

We are all guilty.

What are we all guilty of?

A ton of shit.

Could you be more specific?

(yes this is and my higherself conversing)

How much do you want to write?

Good point.

It figures Low by Cracker was the next song.

Guilt.

I’ve been guilty of so much that I can’t even stop to think about it, the memory reel is going to fast.

It paused me for a second.

I need to be guilty of something.

Why?

So I can feel like others.

That’s stupid.

Yeah, I know.

I’m guilty of not saying shit when I know the truth.

It’s interesting when I do speak up on LinkedIn. I’ve been using LinkedIn as of late to see how my skills are progressing.

I figure if I can beat the supposed best and brightest they have to offer and clean the floor with them, or they ask me questions which is a new one.

LinkedIn is full of people who desperately seek validation.

It’s easy.

All one has to do is make a valid point that blows their point out of the water. Then refuse to give them validation.

The reason I do this is because these are the same people that post who needs a validation I’m valid.

Really.

One also has to have studied everything I have studied. That’s where I get them.

They haven’t studied what I’ve studied.

The CFO that stopped talking to me once I made it abundantly clear that his oint made zero sense and he should no better being that he’s a CFO.

This is what I’m guilty of. I’m one of the smartest people on the planet, I work at Walmart, I fuck with people who wouldn’t even get in the door any other way.

My bills are paid.

I look at it this way, I’m as lazy as lazy gets. If you want something done quick, find the laziest motherfucker around.

It’s not that I have anything against work, I would just rather work on my theory.

However I need to live, so Walmart it is.

That’s what I’m guilty of. Being a philosopher that should be teaching the younger generation.

Here’s the thing, I’ve worked for years to reach many of them to be shit on by them all.

I don’t take any shit from anyone.

Why would any want to shit on me for being intelligent and figuring shit out.

I don’t know, insecure.

That would be it. If there is one thing about this generation that makes me sick as fuck is there insecurity and making excuses for it.

Have a blessed one and be excellent on purpose

Thank you Queen.

I’m the seeker as the Who started.

This is what I do. I decided to write, hit the shuffle. Then I went out to have a smoke, when I came back Crazy little thing called love was playing and as I started writing The Seeker by The Who came on.

Love is crazy.

Love is not insane.

The definition of insanity is doing the same shit over and over and expecting different results.

Anything else, no matter how much one might think it’s crazy, is totally ok.

Let’s dive right in to see if I know what I’m talking about.

Crazy is giving a woman a poem that she was not expecting.

Doing it again would be insane.

Crazy is loving someone and telling them.

Insane is when they don’t want you and you still follow them around like a lost dog.

Crazy is doing the unexpected.

Insane is doing only what’s expected.

Now this one, has caveats. At work doing what is expected is a good thing.

Everything has one exception.

I think of love and not romantic love. I don’t know if it’s been too long since I’ve had a hug or something else. However, I look at life and something is missing.

Someone.

I don’t know who.

This was the line from Rock And Roll Never Forgets as I walked into my room after having a smoke and grabbing coffee.

That was my day.

I just got home and tonight was fun.

I got told my art work and the message on it was well received.

Then Sapphire happened. The laziest person I work with. She stopped working a section and did something else. While she was on her phone. This meant that she couldn’t hear me when I asked a tool.

At her age I had already been on a humanitarian mission in the Air Force.

I have no patience for stupidity. Being at work on your phone is stupid.

Next I had Em. Em thought he was going to be a smart ass until I said some shit that made him feel as guilty as he was.

I got teach a couple people some shit.

I think about my dignity and my integrity. The two go hand in hand.

I used to be the world’s biggest smart ass. Now, I’m the dick that fucks up how smart they thought they were and lets them see where they fucked up.

Working with me is easy, working against me will go very bad for you.

I’m as pleasant as can be at work.

However,I remember what changed it for me, my son.

I used to be a pain in the ass because I was trying to be. Now I’m a pain the ass for working and doing what I’m supposed to making others look like shit.

No one wants to be near me because I work like motherfucker.

And I don’t like rap, far be it from me but when I hear nigger over and over again at work, somebody has got a real disrespect problem. That they feel what they listen to is what everyone within earshot should listen to, that means they have zero respect for anyone else.

This is the new generation, you really need to learn your manners.

The one dude who’s half my age, got raised right. Works his ass off making me look bad, I’m 50, he’s 25. He should be making look bad.

Not all of the new generation needs come upins.

Come upins is where you come up against the shit that fucks you up and based on how you deal with it, could be more on your plate, or your done.

I’ve had my fair share of come upins.

Have a blessed one and be excellent on purpose.

Shinedown.

You can do much better, trust me.

This is my life. I’m always working to get better since my stroke 5 years ago. I know how much better I can do. It frustrates me to no end.

Both sides now by Neil Diamond is playing.

I’ve seen me at an IQ of 215 before my stroke. People hated seeing my name when I commented. They knew they were done because they couldn’t argue against my point unless they lied.

Since my stroke, I understand that I don’t speak well and it’s my shit to deal with. No one is at fault. It just is.

This is how I deal with it. I fight every day to get better every day. I’m getting better every day. My writing is proof of that.

I don’t get stuck on words as much. Thinking about a word didn’t used to be a problem for me.

Used to be I had a mastery of the English language.

I write this and I’m at peace with it. I know I’m getting better daily.

Have a blessed one and be excellent on purpose.

I love the Killers and this song is one reason why.

People worry about the dumbest shit.

What does worrying get anybody?

Absolutely nothing.

Stress and stress and stress.

I used to worry about shit all the time, I got better.

A gentleman has nothing to worry about other than is he doing what he’s supposed to be doing, if yes, no worry.

A gentleman works at himself, but not to the cost of others.

A gentleman is always their for others and it doesn’t matter who. A child, a woman, an elder another gentleman, or a piece of shit.

Pieces of shit can be smelled from far away. As one gets closer to see the shit, one understands why it’s shit and goes with the flow.

A gentleman may or may not give to pieces of shit.

If a gentleman does give his time to a piece of shit, the piece of shit should be grateful.

The gentleman takes time to build pieces of shit into decent human beings.

The gentleman has patience that Job wished he had.

An actual gentleman will never lie to anyone about anything.

If a gentleman is telling you some bad shit, it’s because it’s true.

This is what I do. My week encapsulated and what comes out, this is what is coming out.

A gentleman never attacks, however will defend those who are being attacked.

A gentleman is precise in his language, meaning he will make sure he is understood using the simplest language.

Why use colorful words when simple ones will do?

If one wants to write poetry be as colorful as one can be.

When attempting to communicate with another, use small words.

Your thesaurus skills impress no one.

A gentleman is never looking for a lady, however if one shows up, he will give her his undivided attention.

Allowing the conversation to lead to God knows where.

While a gentleman may want a lady, a gentleman never allows himself to think of her in any lustful way.

Respect, self respect is what a gentleman has. Why would a gentleman disrespect another knowing he would first have to disrespect himself?

Fuck off with name calling, only truly pathetic scum of the fucking earth do that shit.

A gentleman swears to make a point.

However, he knows other words as well.

I could add more, and probably will.

Have a blessed one and be excellent on purpose.

Boston takes you through my day sort of.

I worked last night for the 5th straight night. I’m hurting.

If any of you have read me, you know that on a 1-10 scale of pain, my 8 would kill most people.

I’m at a 9 on my scale, meaning most of you couldn’t live doing what I do. That fucks with me. For me physical pain is more of an annoyance than anything.

When I got home I get naked, put in my comfy clothes, rolled a joint and headed downstairs for coffee. I had filled up the Keurig before I left.

My roommate decided to empty it out and when I discovered that I had already smoked the joint. I am in pain, so my patience is limited.

Had that been the first time, almost every time I want to make a cup of coffee I have to refill the damn water reservoir thing up.

This is a little thing, that could get someone killed.

I know how deadly I am.

I could walk into his room and snap his neck, why don’t I do it?

Because I live by one rule, don’t go to jail.

That means anything illegal is off the table.

And tonight I had someone put me in my place and I didn’t like it, however she was absolutely correct I’m what she had to say. I’m dealing with it.

Philosophers such as myself have a responsibility to everyone.

We are the deep thinkers.

We solve the shit that you need solved.

It’s our place to run shit. Not politicians, really intelligent people.

There should be an IQ standard for and civil service. If you aren’t intelligent you don’t get to run anything but a business.

I look at the world with veteran eyes.

If you served your country allowing us all to not have to worry, you should run the country.

If we look at those who run shit, I don’t want any drunks. Alcohol destroys the brain and pickles the body.

I get why prohibition got started. I get why some religions have no booze.

This is me in pain.

This is me dealing with it.

Have a blessed one and be excellent on purpose.

Steve Winwood is to blame for this.

I live a higher love.

Others do too.

What is it that lifts us up?

No complaining.

A complaint that has no solution is going to tank you.

I look at what I could complain about, eh, doesn’t bother me.

I have zero complaints about my life.

The closest thing to a complaint is just a matter of waiting.

I hate it when people bitch, moan and complain.

I truly hate it when they complain about a contract they signed and the other party did their part, but what is it about student loans that people don’t want to live up their side of the deal?

I signed a contract and I have an outstanding student loan.

I don’t expect anyone to pay for my student loan.

I look at as if I didn’t think I had to pay, why?

What’s so special about me that I don’t have to pay my student loan?

I’m responsible.

At some point I’ll pay it. It’s my debt and I have the obligation to pay it.

The whole student debt thing is about responsibility, and those who cry over student debt, fuck ’em.

Why can’t others be responsible as I am?

It’s a choice we all make.

Choose responsibility.

The Guess Who makes to the table while Life is Beautiful by Sixx A.M. follows suit.

If you can say something nice, make sure it’s damn true.

While I am as grateful as grateful could be for my last wife, she took advantage of me in ways I can’t even describe. She’s a dream weaver, meaning she can invade your dreams and make you see shit that most people would actually fall for.

Imagine you have a dream where you appear in a coral with the posts are pink demon looking things.

There’s a house and a boy standing in the second story window.

So I go in the house and there’s a few people at the table. They said your dead, now you can tell all your secrets.

That’s when I headed out of the house and figured out where the exit was.

Had this been the only time she fucked with my dreaming, I wouldn’t have developed dream defense. Wouldn’t even have thought of it.

Thank you.

There was one that I wish I could have again because it was cool as fuck. Fucked up shit, kind of demonic, but it was cool.

I exorcise demons, for me it’s like a kid in the candy store. I get most people would be rightly terrified by shit I don’t even blink at.

I always wanted to meet a dude that can do the shit I do. Instead I became me.

And I can teach anyone.

My email is jimccarterjr@gmail.com.

Two C’s.

So now Kansas has told be to carry on wayward son, so I bid adieu.

Van Hagar, well Van Halen is the ones you have to thank.

Dreams.

You never know what you’ll find.

That’s a fact I can’t escape. Doesn’t matter what I want, or think or feel I won’t know until I show up.

Everything I think might happen is nothing but a dream.

Thank you Jackie Wilson.

My heart got high today.

Sweetheart showed up for work today.

I love her face.

Her mother had a heart attack and that’s why she missed work.

Free Fallin’ by Tom Petty is playing and I’m in a free fall and I don’t care if I land.

It feels like I’m in love, and no.

Hungarian heart always falls in love first, then they get to them.

I’m working at not being that.

You ever look at someone for the first time and it hits you. I’ve had this happen before. I get the guidance is wait for her mother to be ok and then she’ll invite you to a date, but not a date.

I get it.

When I was 18 her name was something different. But she had the same skills. But she doesn’t know.

Telling someone their a telepath isn’t fun. Think about it.

I figured out when I was 37.

I talked to many people from my past to find out what I thought, I was correct without fail. Even though most of the time I was lied to.

Think about knowing the lies that you e heard that at one point you thought were true and then you figure out you already knew.

I can’t explain the emotional rollercoaster. It’s different for everyone.

I used to do this 6 days a week as an admin for an Empath group.

I was the guy that could tell them what they actually were, and it was not fun, it was work.

I’m a workaholic. I know me, I’ve seen me throw myself into something time and time again.

Doesn’t matter if you paid, if you do it 6 or more days a week and never tire of it, your a workaholic.

Imagine just came on.

That’s what I want to work on, building bridges of peace, I would never get tired of that.

Thank you Glen Frey.

How do I explain the feeling that I belong to Chico?

Everyone belongs where they are, if they didn’t the would be somewhere else.

If I move I’ll belong to that city. However, I never think about leaving. I figure if the opportunity comes up, it will. If not, nothing to worry about.

Why allow thinking of another place distract me from my life where it is now?

What purpose would it serve?

If I’m daydreaming about my life and where I want it to go, that’s egocentric.

If I’m daydreaming about my life and where people need someone like me?

That’s thinking we.

Stop thinking about the me.

Think about the we.

This is how we create our lives.

We create our lives while daydreaming.

We.

It’s all about we.

Tell me something not about me, but about a we you used to know.

I’m watching Star Trek TOS.

The episode has an alien that feeds on war.

What if the Gods that everyone believes in are using us to fuel their need for entertainment?

I was watching The Expendables and I get it.

We like watching violence.

We don’t necessarily like to become violent.

I’m at peace most of the time. It takes effort to keep my peace.

What is it that gets one to feel like violence is the answer?

We have many ways to justify violence as  humanity.

Why don’t we have many ways to justify peace?

Because then what would they do for vengeance?

A proportional response.

What does that even mean?

It means you destroy a target or targets worth what they destroyed of yours.

That’s stupid.

If we want peace on Earth, we have to fuck off the proportional response.

We need to give peace a chance through negotiating.

Take the power back and use it to put peace in our minds, souls and hearts.

Queen, if you don’t like this band, it’s says everything wrong about you.

We, it’s a we that gets things done.

From everything we do we count on others.

I want to write right now. I needed the dudes who made my phone, the dudes and broads that run the electricity, the dudes and broads that run the communication shit for wifi, the dudes and broads…you get the point.

I needed everyone to do their part so I could write right now.

Never think about me.

Think about the we.

A new mantra I’m creating for myself in this moment.

I watched a couple YouTube clips I made several years ago, before my stroke.

I was impressed by the dude in the video. I can’t explain what it’s like to lose the ability to speak and then see yourself when you could speak.

I’ve been getting better daily, but I’m nowhere near 100%, maybe 75% or less.

It’s been 5 years.

Now I’m living the dream.

The place, the job, all I need now is an actual fucking bed. Still sleeping on a cot. It’s a comfy cot, but it’s not a bed.

If I’m honest with myself I’m missing a woman.

A woman that can put me in my place. A woman that can learn from me as she teaches me. A Conduit, meaning I channel her guidance to her through my mouth.

A woman that understands that and wants to learn.

I’m looking for my mirror reflection in the female form.

Wise as shit and no one cares, can get people to fuck off by telling them the truth, and stuff.

It’s takes a we for me to meet her.

That will be a glorious day for the we we become and the we will rock you.

If you understood that last sentence, I might be looking for you.